Chapter 765 : Keiren's Reasons
Drayce returned to Keiren's residence as he had promised Seren they would be having a morning meal together. He clearly understood her intentions; she wanted him to have a morning meal with Keiren. She was doing everything she could to bring him closer to his brother, and he didn't want to disappoint her. Perhaps he also wanted what she was aiming for.
The servants prepared breakfast for them, and Drayce, Seren, and Keiren sat around the rectangular dining table. Drayce and Keiren both sat quietly while Seren wondered how to make them talk freely like a family.
For a moment, she imagined all the Ivanov siblings sitting around the dining table and chatting happily. She especially missed the youngest brother, Prince Ruven. 'If Ruven were here, he would definitely make these two stubborn brothers talk, even if it meant scolding them.'
Last time when she saw the siblings together, only Drayce and Keiren were missing.
"Lord Ren," Seren began, "I hope you plan to spend the entire winter here. The baby is too small to travel around."
After what Seren had done to help Edith and his baby, Keiren had no restraint in talking with her. "I will stay in the south until winter is over, but not in this city."
"Are you planning to leave Blackhelm?" she asked, not liking the idea.
He nodded. "I have made arrangements closer to the coastal area city, which is more peaceful, and no one would recognize us. We will wait until the baby is well enough to travel."
Seren looked at Drayce. Though calm, she was sure he was not happy to hear it. But he said nothing.
Seren didn't know how to convince Keiren to stay either. He was older than her, and it was his decision to make for his family.
After breakfast, Seren returned to Edith's room, leaving the two brothers alone, hoping to enjoy the remaining days with the baby before they moved to another city. Meanwhile, Drayce had Keiren head to Keiren's study, as Drayce wished to talk to him.
Keiren sat in the chair behind his desk while Drayce walked towards the large window of the study and stood, looking outside.
There was silence for a while before Drayce spoke, not looking at his brother, his expression serious. "Why are you doing this?"
"What do you mean?" Keiren asked, seemingly engrossed in the scroll in his hands.
"Why are you keeping your family away?" Drayce asked. "You've even assumed a different identity."
"I prefer it this way," Keiren replied calmly, not bothered by Drayce's questions.
There was another silence before Drayce finally turned to look at Keiren. "Are you trying to go away from us to never return?"
Keiren's hands shook slightly as he placed the scroll back on the table. He heard Drayce again, "You're planning to sever your relationship with the Ivanovs and live with this new identity of yours."
Keiren looked up, meeting Drayce's gaze. "Yes, that is what I am planning."
"Why?" Drayce asked.
"After serving as King of this kingdom for all these years, and growing up in the kind of royal family we have, you should be first one to understand my reasons," Keiren replied.
"I want to hear it from you," Drayce insisted, clearly not happy that his brother was planning go away.
"Because I don't want my family to suffer what we have been through, especially my kids. I want a peaceful life with my wife and family. I don't want to see the day where family members have no love among them and are simply objects of power in others' eyes. I don't want one brother against another. I want my family to live an ordinary life where there is no power struggle, no scrutiny from others.
There should be warmth and love from family. What we as a kind could not get from our family, I want my kids to have it.
"I want my kids to grow up with their innocence intact and not have to work hard to prove themselves to others. I want my kids to experience the love from their parents that we could never get. I want to make up for what we lacked in life. I never wanted to gain any power, but couldn't stop others from assuming it and then creating a distance between us.
Until I had Edith, I didn't have any true family, but now I know what it means to have one. I don't want it to be tainted by the power of royalty."
There was a silence in the study once Keiren stopped talking.
Drayce looked at him, feeling the weight of his brother's words. He wished he could do the same as what Keiren was planning.
Keiren continued, "The day you were announced as the king of this kingdom, trust me, I was the happiest person because I knew finally I could be free from all that burden and find my way out. Since then, I have been planning to go away to find my peaceful life, and I am finally succeeding. But that doesn't mean I neglected my duties towards the kingdom that you entrusted to me. I fulfilled them all."
"I know. You are the one to bring secret news through your spies from Thevailes while others thought you were colluding with them to stand against me," Drayce added.
"See, this is what I was talking about. Even if I do something good, to others it always looks like we are plotting against each other for the throne. Even when I care for you as my brother and consider you as one, the world would never see it that way. They will always look at me as someone who is displeased because his younger brother is a king. I never wanted the throne.
All I ever wanted was to run away from it, and you becoming a king simply fulfilled my wish."
"You will never tell your wife and kids who you truly are?" Drayce asked.
"There is no need. They would know me by my new identity, and we would live as ordinary nobles."
"So you want to run away, leaving it all to me," Drayce's gaze filled with sadness.
"I believe, given the opportunity, you would run away as well, giving up the throne, but you can't."
Drayce knew his brother spoke the truth. He would leave with Seren and never return to this chaotic life of power and royalty.
Seeing his sadness, Keiren spoke, "I am sorry that I found this way for me, but my decision is final. I do hope, with Seren by your side, you will find peace as well."
Drayce nodded, "She is the reason I can keep going on."
"I am relieved to see you have a woman like her as your wife," Keiren added. "Even if I leave, I will allow you and your wife to visit me whenever you wish. I hope that will be enough to make up for it."
Drayce could only agree, knowing there was no way he could stop his brother.
"Once Drayce stepped out of the study, Seren asked. "What did you talk about?"
Drayce quietly looked at her, though he said nothing, his gaze conveyed that whatever they talked about had made him sad.
Seren held his hand in hers, and caressed gently to comfort him.