The System Mistook Me for a Cat

Cheng Cai was one of the graduates from No. 5 High School and a local of Jin City.

After graduating from university, she returned to Jin City to work and lived at home.

Although she loved small animals and watched various cat and dog videos every day, her family was allergic to pet hair, so she couldn't keep a dog.

Life went on uneventfully until Cheng Cai came across a video titled "Ah Chu and Three-Five-Five."

Since her feed was usually filled with small animals, when she randomly browsed through live streaming channels, she mostly encountered pet streamers. This time was no different - as her finger swiped, she saw a young girl with her back to the camera.

The streamer seemed to be standing at a high point, broadcasting the sunset to her viewers, but Cheng Cai found the building in the frame familiar... wasn't that where she worked?

She realized this must be a local content creator.

The streamer didn't talk much. When Cheng Cai tuned in, it seemed to be during a Q&A and break time. The camera captured half of her body as she leaned on the rooftop railing, chatting with viewers while enjoying the scenery.

More than the streamer herself, what impressed Cheng Cai was the camera work and video quality. Not only was the image quality eye-catching... but the camera movements were peculiar. While the streamer was just watching the scenery, the camera would alternate between high and low angles, circling around her several times—thinking about it more carefully made it seem almost creepy.

Cheng Cai imagined the cameraman climbing on chairs and crawling on the ground, thinking this streamer had hired quite an odd photographer.

It wasn't until the camera switched to an aerial view looking down at the street that Cheng Cai realized something was off:

"Where is the photographer standing to get this floating angle?"

However, this thought merely flashed through her mind, and she was about to quickly switch to another live stream... until a cat appeared in the frame.

It was a thick-furred tortoiseshell cat that looked quite solid at first glance.

Cheng Cai compared it mentally and thought this cat must be almost as big as a Maine Coon.

The large cat wandered over and gave a soft "meow."

The streamer said: "Three-Five-Five is done using the bathroom, so let's head home, and thanks to the fan who lent us the litter box today... Don't be silly, no matter how amazing Three-Five-Five is, she won't clean her own litter."

Cheng Cai realized: Oh, so Three-Five-Five is the cat?

She had seen viewers in the chat calling "Chu-mi, Chu-mi," and thought the streamer was called "Three-Five-Five" and the cat was named "Ah Chu."

Why were they named that way?

While Cheng Cai was puzzling over this, she saw the streamer lightly jump onto the railing and say, "Well, time for us to head home."

Cheng Cai: "?" Wait!

Before her surprise could even register, she watched as the streamer balanced on one foot on the railing, made an aerial turn, grabbed the edge of the railing while falling, and swung herself onto the water tank on the roof below.

The camera pulled back at this moment, and the cat jumped down too. Human and cat synchronized their flips, jumps, and landings, descending the building in a way that Cheng Cai found terrifying.

As other tall buildings blocked the view, only a corner of Cheng Cai's workplace remained visible in the frame. She watched as the girl bounced and jumped across the tops of commercial buildings, moving as easily as if walking on flat ground.

Parkour? Yes, Cheng Cai realized this must be a parkour content creator. Although her ID included her pet's name, this wasn't just a "cute pet" channel—this was a pet that joined her in outdoor activities.

Cheng Cai had never watched parkour videos before and only had a vague understanding of it, but she felt there was something special about "Ah Chu." Before running and jumping, she said "I'm heading home now."

As if parkour was just a normal means of transportation, with crowded streets below her, she left them aside, jumping and running across rooftops of varying heights.

Then she stopped not far from No. 5 High School, bought a crepe at the stand near the school gate, with egg and sausage added, and before pulling down her mask, she waved at the camera: "See you all tomorrow."

The screen went dark.

Then Cheng Cai instinctively hit "Follow."

She remained on the live streaming interface, and after a few seconds, the dark screen lit up again, starting to replay the streamer's previous broadcast.

The camera showed a somewhat fresh-faced young girl.

She was wearing summer clothes and was live streaming while helping someone find their cat.

Cheng Cai spent several days gradually catching up on all of Chu Tingwu's videos, downloaded her app, browsed through it for half a day, and couldn't resist buying some cute yet practical merchandise. Then, when watching Chu Tingwu's live stream again, she donated ten yuan and joined the video platform's fan group.

The group indeed had more content, including many fan-taken photos when they happened to spot her, fan art, and everyone sharing pictures of their cats and dogs.

Although they lived in the same city and even attended the same school, Cheng Cai never thought about deliberately trying to run into her—she still didn't quite understand why she followed Chu Tingwu and began habitually watching her streams, even watching replays when she missed the live broadcasts.

Chu Tingwu wasn't an enthusiastic content creator, and Three-Five-Five wasn't a cat that liked to perform for the audience.

Most of the time, the streamer just did her own things: homework, preparing cat food, parkour, teaching cat language, even learning Russian. She would upload fragments of her daily life and occasionally chat with fans in the comments.

But among all these ordinary fragments, Cheng Cai would notice some extraordinary things: like how the streamer lived alone with her cat, how she modified her own streaming drone, how skilled she was at cooking both for cats and humans, how she exercised every day...

Then she would look at her own messy room, the untouched craft supplies she bought, the cake maker she'd only used twice, and the dusty Ring Fit Adventure, and vaguely understood why.

In so many phases of her life, she had said "what if I did this or that," but never persisted. Sometimes she would imagine what might have happened if she had—would she be working in a big city? Living alone with a cat? Living healthily enough to grow another three centimeters taller?

So she started following Ah Chu, a junior from the same No. 5 High School, a major content creator with a million followers, one of the judges for national competitions, and the youngest parkour prodigy recognized in the country.

So now Cheng Cai stood somewhat awkwardly outside No. 5 High School.

Although she hadn't graduated that long ago, she clearly couldn't blend in with the school-age crowd anymore. She looked at the security guard, whose face seemed unfamiliar, but the guard was quite calm, having people at the gate line up and asking her to show her number from the "No. 5 High School Adoption" mini-program: "You're number 119, we only let in 50 people at a time, so you'll have to wait a while if you want to go in now. Are you sure you want to enter now?"

Cheng Cai: "Ah! I used to be a student here too, I can look around the school."

She had visited the Natural Museum several times when she was a student.

In her memory, it was completely led by teachers, rushing through in a blur, but she remembered the cramped space and musty smell. The teachers kept emphasizing quietness, while Cheng Cai and her deskmate secretly shared snacks, the two girls eating like squirrels with their heads down, momentarily making the smell less noticeable.

So although her impression of the "small zoo" wasn't great, it was still one of those rare relaxing moments for high school students.

She did as she told the security guard and started touring the campus.

In her memory, No. 5 High School's campus wasn't small, but after going to university, she realized it wasn't as big as she had imagined.

She only remembered which class she was in during her senior year, so she went around to look at the building. Senior students didn't get Saturdays off, and Cheng Cai's sharp eyes caught sight of her former homeroom teacher. Her scalp tightened, and she turned to leave immediately.

—Better go sit by the lake, or head straight to the Natural Museum.

Because the campus was open, there were people at Tranquil Thought Lake too. Cheng Cai saw a somewhat familiar figure from afar, and in the blink of an eye, the person keenly turned their head.

Cheng Cai: "..."

Ah!

What should you say when you suddenly meet the famous content creator you follow in person!?

Ah Chu looked much the same as she did in the livestream, except she wasn't wearing a black mask this time and had wrapped herself in a long-sleeved shirt. Despite the erratic weather, she still wore shorts on her lower half.

She calmly nodded at Cheng Cai, then lowered her head—Cheng Cai noticed that there were two cats and a dog in front of her.

Cheng Cai: "Ah!"

What should you say when you suddenly meet the big cat you've been following?

One of the cats was a long-haired calico named Three-Five-Five, and the other was a white lion cat that Cheng Cai didn't recognize but knew from the livestream was the school's campus cat.

As for the dog in between the two cats, it was naturally the school-adopted Yorkshire Terrier named Cheng Cheng, and its age should be greater than the combined ages of the two cats.

Cheng Cai remembered!

She had seen this dog during her senior year of high school! Back then, it was lying next to the peacocks, squeezed into a small corner, its fur covering its eyes. The students nearby pointed at it and said, "Why is there a dog next to the peacocks?"

Cheng Cai didn't point, she just watched, and then listened to the caretaker's somewhat impatient explanation.

Before leaving, she turned back and saw the dog had curled itself into an even smaller, less noticeable ball.

Now, the dog hadn't grown much, but it was well-groomed, wearing a brand-new collar. It was smaller than the two cats but stubbornly stood between them, straight and tall, first barking twice at the calico, then twice at the lion cat.

Strangely, Cheng Cai remembered that small dogs usually had shrill, piercing barks, but this Yorkshire Terrier's bark was crisp, without any extra "words," as if it were lecturing.

The two cats didn't react much. Three-Five-Five let out an impatient "meow," and the lion cat tucked its tail and arched its back.

Only Chu Tingwu reacted.

Cheng Cai watched as her UP main nodded seriously and said to the dog, "You're right."

Cheng Cai: "..."

Ah?

-

Chu Tingwu had originally come out to find Three-Five-Five and Cheng Cheng.

Cats aren't known for their endurance or fondness for long runs, but Three-Five-Five's pace was fine for walking Cheng Cheng.

However, when Chu Tingwu arrived, she found Three-Five-Five and the lion cat tangled up in a fight in the grass, with Cheng Cheng barking anxiously nearby, trying to jump in and mediate but unable to get through to either.

Just as the dog was about to tangle itself up in the leash, Chu Tingwu arrived in full force, stepping in to help her cat... well, to stop the fight.

Then she noticed that Cheng Cheng had positioned itself between the two cats, trying to mediate with its doggy dialect.

After listening for a while, she couldn't help but wonder, "Is it using cat language it learned on its own?"

After all, the Jin City Police Dog Training Base... also has cats, and they're the kind that are smart enough to mediate fights and so human-like that they're about to become police cats.

The white lion cat, though unable to win with the crowd (or lack thereof) on its side, didn't give up and kept circling. Whenever Chu Tingwu stopped, Cheng Cheng would stand in front of Three-Five-Five, first barking twice at the lion cat, then twice at Three-Five-Five.

Although she couldn't understand the barks, Chu Tingwu could fully read its body language and expressions. It was clearly saying:

"Fighting is bad, don't fight, woof!"

Three-Five-Five & Lion Cat: Mind your own business?

...It was a completely ineffective mediation.

Considering the dog's age was actually greater than theirs, Chu Tingwu lovingly patted its head.

It was then that Cheng Cai approached. As soon as she got close, Chu Tingwu sensed the gaze on her and turned her head, easily identifying Cheng Cai as an adopter who had just entered the school.

Twenty-something, didn't drive, took the subway to school, works in an office, doesn't have pets at home, lives close to the Fifth Middle School...

As Cheng Cai got closer, these details popped into Chu Tingwu's mind one by one, so she said, "Lost? Want to go to the Natural History Museum with me?"

Cheng Cai: "Sure, sure!"

On the way, staring at Chu Tingwu's obviously underage face, Cheng Cai didn't have the heart to say she was a fan, so she just talked about the adoption: "I also graduated from the Fifth Middle School, so when I found out about the adoption, I came to take a look... um, when I made the appointment on the app, I chose a parrot..."

Many zoos have adoptions that start at a year, with prices generally in the four-digit range. The animals at the school aren't as rare as those in zoos, so after thinking about it, everyone decided to set the adoption period at three years, which also coincided with their three years of schooling, with prices under a thousand.

As for the Yorkshire Terrier Cheng Cheng and the female peacock Blue, they were set for lifetime adoption, with prices naturally higher.

The little peacock egg, on the other hand, was paid for annually, with the current cost split among four people, not expensive. And all four of them believed that after they graduated and moved on, they would be able to more easily afford the child's living expenses.

Parrots were naturally the cheapest of all the adoption options—not rare, daily food consumption wasn't high, and they weren't too difficult to care for unless they got sick. The biggest expense was actually labor.

But Chu Tingwu believed that many adopters probably came for the parrots, thinking, "There are so many parrots, and if I can't get a capybara, I can at least get a parrot."

But while adopters might think that way, Chu Tingwu couldn't be so perfunctory.

She nodded, "So do you have any preferences for personality or color? Do you like blue or green, spotted or not, active or quiet?"

Cheng Cai: "?"

She humbly asked, "Appearance aside, can personality be seen?"

Chu Tingwu: "Currently, the first 50 people who made appointments have been allowed in, and almost all of them have other animals as their primary targets, with parrots ranking third or fourth—after all, the adoption lasts for three years, so everyone can take their time to consider, so each person can stay for 45 minutes. Which batch is your number in?"

Cheng Cai showed her the number on her phone.

Then she saw her UP main nod calmly, "My job today is to help everyone pick parrots. Based on your current order, you'll probably have to wait over an hour to get in... If you're curious, do you want to come in with me now?"

Cheng Cai: "Sure."

But can you just go in directly? Did the UP main recognize that she was a fan?

UP main: "So do you want to be a volunteer? We provide lunch and small gifts."

Cheng Cai: "..."

She didn't recognize me at all!

Cheng Cai still volunteered.

Chu Tingwu explained that the volunteer work wasn't much, just needing to stand by the enclosure and prevent adopters from feeding the animals or touching them. Since they were volunteers, they wouldn't be paid, but they would be given packages of their own merchandise and small gifts, as well as commemorative badges.

Although the items were of low unit price, and it was strange to go from adopter to volunteer, Chu Tingwu spoke so calmly that Cheng Cai felt inexplicably that giving it a try wouldn't be bad.

It seemed that for this girl, all special experiences in life could be explained with "giving it a try wouldn't be bad." And when Cheng Cai did so, it felt like she was getting one step closer to her.

Then Cheng Cai was pulled into the Natural History Museum by Chu Tingwu, wearing a green apron with various small animals printed on it, standing outside the peacock enclosure, walking back and forth, and smiling at everyone, saying, "Please do not feed the peacocks, and do not reach in to touch them to prevent stress."

Someone raised their hand: "What if the peacock comes over and asks to be petted?"

Cheng Cai: "?"

This adopter silently extended their arm, on which a homely peacock chick was perched.

Qin Lan immediately rushed over: "Sorry, sorry, the kid is a bit outgoing!"

He glanced into the enclosure, then at the parrot house with mesh, and carried the chick into the parrot house, placing it on a random perch.

There was more than one volunteer in the Natural History Museum, including employees from a cooperative app company who came to help, teachers who happened to be free, cousins called by students, and caretakers who were originally responsible for these tasks—the overall work was quite relaxed, so Cheng Cai could watch while also observing Chu Tingwu helping others pick parrots.

Yes, she really could "pick" them!

Those who failed to adopt other furry animals were now gathered outside the bird pavilion, and the adoption account's camera was also pointed at this location—

Today's adoption process was live-streamed, so adopters who took numbers later could also know the progress in real-time.

However, Cheng Cai herself, when putting herself in the adopters' shoes, felt that it was actually unnecessary to do so—if they knew there were only parrots left, many people might just not bother to come.

Of course, the money for the other animals had already been collected, but Cheng Cai guessed that the unsold parrots might have to rely on online marketing, with fans adopting them virtually—after all, the price wasn't too high.

There weren't many fans like her who originally came (because parrots were cheap) specifically for parrots.

Several volunteers from the bird pavilion came over to distribute forms to the fans in line, asking them to tick the parrots they had a preference for: since they were already here, only a few waved their hands to refuse the forms, while others, like Cheng Cai, were curious and sat down at the tables or stood to fill them out.

She heard someone say, "I see on the form that after adoption, a corresponding leg ring will be put on the parrot... but if I come back to see the parrot later, even with a leg ring, I won't be able to tell it apart."

A little girl from another (1) class clasped her hands together: "I'm sorry, we currently can't afford the price of chip leg rings, so we can't track the parrots' locations—"

Cheng Cai: Of course, a chip costs more than the adoption fee!

The little girl said, "But after adoption, you can name the parrot, and we will try our best to teach the parrot to recognize its own name, so that when you come later, just call its name, and it will respond!"

The person was taken aback: "Ah? Is that possible? I'm not arguing with you, I just think this workload is too much, and you're all students, there's really no need to do this."

And the adoption fee isn't expensive, just consider it support for the students' work.

Another person came over, curious: "There are so many parrots, can this really be taught? And these requirements we fill out, can we really find a parrot we want? How about this, I'm quite curious, I want a parrot that's smart, lively, and personable, looks aren't important, if you can find one that comes over when I call it, I can pay the adoption fee right now."

Someone next to him glared at him.

The little girl, however, smiled and nodded, taking the form to find Chu Tingwu at the entrance of the bird pavilion.

Chu Tingwu tilted her head and listened for a while, then walked into the bird pavilion, quickly bringing out a green cockatiel.

From Cheng Cai's perspective across the way, it seemed she just glanced around and then randomly picked one out.

The bird looked lively and healthy, standing on Chu Tingwu's finger, its head turning around to look around.

The adopter obviously wasn't too satisfied, curious: "Will it come over when I call it?"

Chu Tingwu transferred the bird from her left hand to her right, then signaled the adopter to extend his hand and placed the green parrot on his finger.

The parrot seemed very outgoing, squatting calmly on the finger.

Chu Tingwu said, "Give it a name, then try releasing it?"

The parrot's head turned 180 degrees, curiously observing the human behind it. The adopter gently stroked the bird's back, feeling the warm and fluffy touch, his breathing even lightened a bit: "Rongrong?"

"Chirp."

Chu Tingwu poked the parrot, had the adopter call it a couple more times, and gave him some bird food to feed it by hand—it was clear to everyone that even if the bird wasn't affectionate, the adopter would probably still pay up obediently.

You've named it, how can you not take care of it?

When Chu Tingwu signaled the adopter to let go, he was still reluctant: "It won't get stepped on when it flies out, will it? It's gripping me tightly, can it really fly?"

Chu Tingwu: "=="

The adopter raised his arm, and the little bird flapped forward for a bit, landed, and turned its head in confusion.

Then, Cheng Cai saw, the bird in front of her strolled back, flapped its wings again, and landed back on the adopter's finger.

The adopter then placed the bird on the table, and under the gaze of everyone around, when the adopter called out "Rongrong" from behind, it actually turned its head, its beady eyes reflecting the human's face, and then, it hopped over to this human.

Indeed, the adoption was settled.

Humans keep pets largely because of the interaction they enjoy with them. After confirming the adoption of "Rongrong," the adopter kept the parrot with him, deciding to spend the remaining 45 minutes with the parrot.

Others were also curious, especially curious about Chu Tingwu's ability to pick parrots—

"How can you pick such smart and affectionate parrots?"

"Just remember the appearance and personality of all the parrots."

Everyone: "……"

Is this something a normal person can remember?

Just looking at them is already dizzying! And even if you remember, how can you find the one you remember so quickly, are your eyes scanners?

Actually, it's not by sight, but by smell that Chu Tingwu finds the parrots: "Huh?"

"But…" she said, "although I've done my best, some parrots are just a bit dumb by nature, and teaching them might be a bit difficult, but if you come to visit your parrot later, as long as I'm here, I can find the one you adopted."

No chip? No problem, there's a human recognition device here.

Immediately, someone raised their hand: "Then I also want a smart parrot baby!"

Chu Tingwu: "Sure."

Another person quickly said: "Smartness doesn't matter, can you pick one with blue-green feathers, almost no gray, I just like beautiful ones, and it would be even better if I could take more photos."

Chu Tingwu: "Wait a moment, there is one like that."

Everyone immediately got excited.

Cheng Cai also got nervous, typing "pa pa" in the local fan group: "Those with earlier numbers, hurry up, or the pretty and smart ῳ*Ɩ parrots will all be picked—"

Fans familiar with her: "Ah? Aren't all budgerigars like this, is there a difference?"

The fans originally didn't plan to come, the adoption price of a parrot, symbolically giving some money to the live stream was about the same.

Cheng Cai didn't have time to explain: "Just go watch the live stream!"

The adopters at the scene accidentally started a competition, as soon as Chu Tingwu brought out the second one, someone quickly said: "I don't want a pretty one, can I have an ugly one, one that's uniquely ugly—"

He pointed directly at a gray lump on the parrot stand: "Like that one is good!"

Tang Zhe was shocked: "That's not a parrot, that's our little peacock!"

The peacock chick Qin Lan: "?"

It seemed to understand the adopter's words, "ying" cried, and then buried its head into the chest of the neighboring parrot.

The parrot, almost pushed off, stood firm, only:

This chick, is a bit… a bit big.

Chu Tingwu: "=="